... and it's killing me.
I'm trying to focus as much as I can on my my job so that I think less about him. It's hard though as, at the end of the day, I feel exhausted. I fall asleep on the couch every single evening because of the great amount of stress. I guess it will take time to get over it (if ever). I'm glad we're surrounded by friends who really care about us and keep calling and/or stopping by to check if we are ok. Of course we're not but feeling them close makes a big difference.
Today I'm back to my workout routine. I'm trying to get myself together. It's not easy as living without a him (and, in general without a dog) was inconceivable until one week ago. We all miss him a lot and always will.
Like every trauma, though, I am more aware now of my priorities. For instance, I've become to realize that a dog is more important than having a child to me. I can live without a kid but I can't live without animals. It's quite a radical thought but this is me (and my mum is exactly like me). So, if I get pregnant it's ok if I don't it's ok. However, I don't think I can live without a dog for the rest of my life. I'll give a serious thought in the near future, perhaps after the summer. A dog will come "to us", like Duick. We didn't buy him, someone couldn't take care of him anymore.
Today we're going to visit M, the vet. He LOVED big boy and did everything he could. It's because of him that we adopted Duick. It'll be hard to see M. but we have to.
Wow! OK so that IS quite a big decision (although, quite obviously, I DO understand about the not being able to live without a dog, whereas the kid thing I don't know about).
ReplyDeleteI am pleased, though, that you will get another for the love and care you gave to Big Boy deserves to continue to another fortunate dog.
And you know that, after Rufus, I started thinking of a new puppy.
But I do understand your pain and I'm still sending virtual hugs. It does become bearable in time. Be patient.
p.s. I really like the sound of your Mum too. She thinks like me!
Hi Andy,
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't say that it's a decision. It's more a "revelation", I guess.
Yes, another dog will come. We don't know when, it's too early now. It's a matter of time and luck, like what happened with him.
We didn't expect him and... all of sudden we got a call from M: what about having a gordon setter? It's quite big though, is it fine with you?
The answer was....
:-)
Thank you, I like hugs even if they are virtual! I know you fully understand my pain.
Mi dispiace. You'll get another one. It will never be like Duick but it will be just as wonderful for you. With dime.
ReplyDeleteThank arte :)
ReplyDelete... time, not dime...
ReplyDelete